March 17, 2007

300

Well, as I was sitting in my "basement" with my pots flicking through cable news channels, as chance would wont, I unfortunately, or through sheer laziness, stopped briefly on the Caliphate News Network (CNN), better lately I might add than the completely off the reservation, Muslim Shi'a National Broadcasting Network (MSNBC) and lo, I saw some hagged-up botoxed fag loving CNN film critic critiquing 300. 

Oh baby I thought as I grabbed my favorite pot, I got to see this, and sure enough the Lib-bitch delivered. 300 was "way too violent, and way too cartoonish," and, as she squinted her eyes and flapped her wrists like homosexuals do when they get real excited, she squealed, "It was JUST not for meeeeeeeeee." It was so predictable I almost got a hard on. Then, without mising a beat, she began gushing over the next film she saw, something about a faggot in love with another faggot all chain-fucking in a merry homo cinemaic romp which she thought was really, just simply FAB. A truly great movie. I vomited into my pot. Then, I realized in a sudden flash of historical insight what and where this country is on the War on Terror. I now knew, and 300 held the key to the great conundrum. The answer to this 21st Century Question of who will defend Modern Democracy comes to every American from 480 BC and the Battle of Thermopylae. When a messenger warned Leonidas, The Spartan King, that the Persian Army under Xerxes was invading Greece to destroy Democratic Greece, and that the Athenians were afraid and badly needed help, Leonidas replied, "What do you expect from a nation of philosophers and boy-lovers?" And, strapping on his war gear, took his men and marched into history. And yes, there is a direct parallel between the modern day Marines and their willingness to die to save Democracy and the clueless Liberal boy lovers it so tragically spawns.

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